So, I wake up at five, walk the dog, find a snake at my front door, which is why the dog won’t come inside now. I realize that I’ve crushed the snake when I opened the door and now the door is jammed open.
I’m glad it was a snake actually, because at first I thought the door was all jinked up from the rain we’ve been having. It rains a lot in the summer in Florida. You can set your watch by it, but I haven’t worn one in years.
My wife is deathly afraid of snakes and so is the dog. Yochi, he’s half Chihuahua and half Yorkie, a big baby, and is not so stupid. He has warned me about snakes before. Barked and circled like a maniac. If he thought it was a lizard, well, all bets would be off.
This time he was saying, “hey man, I can’t come in right now, because, well, if you turn the porch light on, you will see this snake and he looks mad; and don’t worry, the neighbors aren’t awake and they won’t see you in your underwear. But before I come in, you need to remove that thing from under the door, capisce? And you know, I can’t bark right now because I will wake up the neighbors and that insane lady across the street will start cursing and screaming and hitting herself in the head with her fist and then I might roll over and pee myself. You know how I get confused.”
Next time I give you permission to bark at five in the morning, but only in emergency situations.
I try to work the snake out by moving the door back and forth, but I had already crushed him before I realized he was even there. Sorry snake. But I hate snakes as well. No hard feelings. Eventually I grab a fork and worked him out.
I took a photo of the snake, but he or she, is too mangled to display here. Orange and white splotches, black and white banded belly, about two feet long and half an inch thick. Just a baby. The head is too crushed to identify. Now he sleeps with the fish. In the lake — literally. (The photo above may be one of his buddies.)
Anyway, when I got up my brain was already saying that it was time to get a new mattress or maybe you hurt your back yanking that bush out yesterday. Then it shifted to twirling investments and not of the standard mold. I have a problem. I’m excited about the future of finance. Fintech and not snakes.
Then the snake sort of derailed that.
I mean, I have a few years experience in the real investment world and even educated myself professionally. And I hated most of it, especially taxes. So I stuck with law enforcement after college. Then I retired a few years ago. Well, sort of retired.
Now I live in snake land.
These days, as you might have noticed, I watch cryptocurrencies. Bitcoin and family. And I do yard work, with the snakes, red ants, other insects that bite the crap out of you, a sun that is too darned hot and a lake that is beautiful. And I come up here to my den and type words on this screen. Maybe do a little trading.
Bitcoin Cash is really irking me though. I think it might be a snake. I did not expect it to be at $600 this morning. As I look now, it’s over $800. I had hoped it would pop. But it has refused to die. Apparently it’s more economical than old bitcoin. I really hope this does not end badly, because I could no longer resist the pull.
Don’t get me wrong. I fought it like any gambler would. I ignored it. Watched as bitcoin original struggled, as Ethereum is taking a beating, as Ripple drips and as Iota — I warned them — has lost a good chunk of value over the last few days.
But I don’t believe in omens. Killing a snake under my front door, in the dark, did not convince me to buy Bitcoin Cash. I awoke with that decision. Usually, those are my best ones. Maybe the snake was trying to distract me?
But, in the end, the giant vacuum cleaner has sucked up some of my funds. Some. Maybe I will be punished. So be it. I have strayed from the flock, Oh Lord. But I feel good about it a this moment.
Tomorrow, when I’m at the bowling alley for a birthday party, rubbing my arthritic knuckles and maybe having one or two beers — at my age — I may be in a bad mood. Maybe the Chinese will be laughing over their American profits, but I don’t get that impression — yet.
And that’s why I wrote this. At times I need to take risks. That snake this morning was not poisonous. But I’ve run into a few bad cryptos out here.
That reminds me, I need to stop wearing flip flops and shorts out here. One of these days I might get bitten, but not so far.
And how high will Bitcoin Cash go? I think, right at this moment, it will blow past bitcoin very soon and leave everyone stunned. But, well, maybe not.
Incidentally, it was an Eastern Corn Snake.
Update: I think Jihan Wu likes Bitcoin Cash.
Have a good day.